As soon as I heard that baritone saxophone, I knew it had to be Lisa Simpson joining Bart, Marge, and Homer over at the neighborhood bench.  Lisa may only be eight years old, but she can play a mean sax!  She is also good on electric bass and piano.  In addition, she has played some trumpet, accordion, violin, tuba, french horn, and has a powerful singing voice. 

It’s Lisa’s love of jazz that makes her my favorite of the Simpsons, because it’s a passion we share; however, we have some values in common as well.  We definitely lean the same way politically (liberal), and she is a big believer in science.  Although I am not a vegetarian like Lisa (I love seafood), her ethical beliefs are quite admirable—especially for a second-grader!  Lisa is a member of PETA and is also big on women’s rights.  She is also concerned with world affairs; and, in the 1990’s, she had an “End Apartheid” poster in her bedroom.  Good on her!

Lisa is a lot more intelligent and innovative than I ever was in the second grade (or ever), though.  As matter of fact, she has a genius IQ and is a member of Mensa in her town of Springfield.  (Thankfully, she got her smarts from her grandmother rather than Homer!)  Between her intelligence and musical talent, she is quite the child prodigy!  After all, how many infants do you know that can change their own diapers and solve mathematical equations as an infant?

Another thing Lisa is really good at (and I am not) is foreign language.  That girl can speak Italian fluently, and she also knows a bit of French, German, and Spanish.

When it comes to her home life, Lisa has a difficult relationship with her dad and brother—something I could relate to when looking back on my childhood!  She fights with her older brother just like I did when I was her age.  Lisa and Bart really go at it!  Still, though, her very first word was, “Bart!”  (Interestingly, the third thing she ever said was, “David Hasselhoff.”)

Lisa is fashionable, usually wearing her a short, strapless red dress with a zigzag hem, matching red Mary-Jane shoes, and a white pearl necklace that was given to her by her mom, Marge.  (When I was in the second grade, I HATED wearing dresses, and was known to pair a checkered shirt with striped pants, when I dressed myself.)

These are a few of my favorite quotes by Lisa Simpson:

“Dad!  The Second Amendment is just a remnant from the Revolutionary day.  It has no meaning today.”  (Amen to that.)

“Don’t you think we ought to attack the roots of our social problems instead of jamming people into overcrowded prisons?”

“I just think it’s a fantasy.  If you believe in angels, why not sea monsters, unicorns, or leprechauns?”

This nearly completes The Simpsons family.  Will Bart and Lisa’s baby sister be next?  Stay tuned to see if Maggie crawls her way to the bench!


Bart Simpson cruised over on his skateboard, this morning, to join his parents on the Sun City Peachtree bench.  “Ay, Caramba!” he exclaimed, when he saw Marge and Homer kissing and holding hands.

As I mentioned in yesterday’s post, Bart is Marge and Homer’s mischevious and rebellious son and older brother to Lisa and Maggie.  He is best known for constantly getting into trouble.  The Simpsons creator, Matt Groenig, must have been a trouble-maker himself, because Bart’s character is loosely based on him and his brother, Mark.

Before he even entered the world, Bart was making trouble.  When Marge was pregnant with Bart and had a sonogram, the not-yet-born baby mooned Dr. Hibbert!

Two years later, when Lisa was born, Bart got jealous of all the attention Lisa was getting, so he tried to draw attention to himself.  Bart couldn’t take it anymore, so he told Lisa he was going to run away.  Then, Lisa said her first word, “Bart!”  Bart heard Lisa and realized how much she loved him, so he decided he had to stay. 

Bart has ADHD and can be a terror at school.  His school grades fluctuate between a “D” and an “F”, because he does’t pay attention.  Bart is actually quite good at science, though, and he has street smarts.  When it comes to anything NOT school-related, he can be quite ingengious and a quick learner.

Unfortunately, though, Bart has a criminal record including indecent exposure, arson, assault with a deadly weapon, burglary, underage drinking, vandalism, grand theft auto, and much more.  The list is long, much to Homer’s chagrin.

You can imagine what Homer thinks of all that trouble Bart gets into. Those two really go at it!  Marge is much more caring, understanding, and nurturing, even though she calls Bart “a handful” and is often embarrased by his antics.

When Bart’s not getting into mischevious, he is actually quite accomplished.  Not only does he perform as a drummer in a successful band and speak several languages, but he also won an award for his Angry Dad web series.  He even discovered a new comet that was named after him!  Bart is also quite the athlete, artist, and chef.

Although Bart gets into a lot of (serious!) trouble and can be shallow and selfish, he also exhibits many qualities of high integrity.  On a few occasions, Bart helped the love life of his school principal and his teacher, despite the fact he often terrorizes them.  He also befriends lesser known kids like Millhouse at the cost of peer popularity with the bullies.  The kid would also do anything for his favorite Krusty the Clown.  In one Season 4 episode, he exclaimed, “That’s not fair!  I’m ten times the Krusty fan you are.  I even have the Krusty Home Pregnancy test!”

Bart is an animal lover and becomes extremely attached to animals that fall under his care.  His dog, named Santa’s Little Helper is his best friend.

The girls seem to like Bart, too, as he has had 16 girlfriends throughout the 32 seasons of The Simpsons, even though he believes that girls have “cooties.”

When it comes to Bart’s gift of gab, not only can he attract the girls, but he also has a keen ability to manipulate and extort. 

On a lighter note, here are some of his his quotes:

“I’m Bart Simpson, who the hell are you?”

“Don’t have a cow, Man!”

“Eat my shorts!”

“I can’t promise I’ll try, but I’ll try to try.”

“But who’d want to hurt me?  I’m this century’s Dennis the Menace!”

To his little sister, Lisa:  “You got the brains and talent to go as far as you want, and when you do, I’ll be right there to borrow money.”